It’s allliiiive

So today I didn’t even need to hangout with the grandparents for a story.

I was exhausted after work and my mile walk home in the rain and decided that a large plate of pasta was in order to gain back all that energy I burned today. I went to the shelf, got a box of pasta, and when I went to take some out, almost all of them were glued together from who knows what. Oldness? There were also weevils all up IN that box.

Fun fact about weevils:

“Their presence is often indicated by the granules of the infested item sticking together in strings, as if caught in a cobweb.” (Thanks, Wiki)

Yet another indication that this dinner would be interesting. Needless to say I chucked that out and went onto pasta box #2. Success.

After the pasta was ready I went to open my delicious jar of melt-in-your-mouth alfredo sauce. Being the ex-grocery clerk that I am, I checked the top of the jar JUST in case…and saw…wait for it…..2008. 2008? No, that must be at least 2009…Maybe it’s written like Europe dates where the month goes last and it’s just August?!…no, no, no. This couldn’t be. In my udder shock I opened the jar that was just moments ago sitting happily on the shelf near the edge, as if just bought. You should’ve seen it. It was a disgrace to all things alfredo. With a whiff and a gag, it was with its weevil friends in the garbage.

shouldah, couldah, wouldah, but wasn't, thanks to alfredo 2008.

And then in my desperation to get some carbs into my belly, I went with buttah. LOTS and LOTS of buttah. I’m not proud, I felt somewhat like a toddler that refuses to eat red sauce “with the chunks”, but hey, I ate it with a salad to keep it classy.

That food pantry better brace itself for what will be the Great Clean of 2011. I’ll have to plan my attack strategically to not cause the gramps to go into cardiac arrest…Or maybe just overload the pantry with groceries and THEN take the 2008s out. We shall see, we shall see…

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